Jeremiah 1:5 – …Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee…
Shortly after our little boy was born, as most new moms do, I experienced that rush of emotions which inevitably leads to inexplicable bouts of tears and weepiness. One of the strangest things I found myself crying over was the fact that I wasn’t pregnant anymore! I had been so sick of being big and pregnant and unable to move around, with hips that hurt and no clothes to wear (I still have few clothes that fit AND are good for nursing, so that situation is almost WORSE!)… yes I was surprised to find myself MISSING being pregnant.
I think it was because I had bonded so with my belly-baby, and now that he was out in public, I felt a bit disconnected from him. I had been so looking forward to his birth, that I didn’t think much about what it would be like to NOT be pregnant. I found a part of me missed it deeply. No longer did I take him to bed with me at night, and wrap my arms around my big tummy and fall asleep. Or rub my belly while waiting in line at the store. Or navel gaze and wonder who this little baby was going to be. Or feel him thump-thump-thump me reassuringly with his little legs or bump-bump-bump me with his hiccups… now I knew what God meant when He wrote that He knew us in the womb. I knew my baby too in the womb – in fact, I “knew” he was a boy (or guessed correctly, I suppose!).
The feeling passed after a few days, and believe me, I am GLAD to not be huge and pregnant anymore. And even more happy to be getting to know this loveable little bundle! I think there will always be a special place in my heart for that time when he slept right under my heart. But now I have our little one out live and in color! The baby I got to know in my belly is a beautiful person I am getting to know all over again from this new outside perspective.