I’m In a Toddler Time Warp

Or did I fall through a wormhole? I’m not sure what the correct sci-fi expression is. Maybe it’s the Twilight Zone!?

The thing is, lately, our oldest son has become fascinated with time. Calendars, clocks, watches. I can’t call it an obsession, because he already thinks he knows everything there is to know. So, there’s no talking to him when he insists tomorrow is happening RIGHT NOW!

Yes, that kind of a toddler time warp. Where his little mind can just bend time to his will. I love it.

But sometimes it’s a bit crazy-making! 

I wake up to: “Mommy, the clock says… Six. Five. Five. You have to get up now.” (Which, because he reads the digital clock numbers incorrectly, actually means it’s 6:22 a.m. Oh no, that is SO not happening for me!).

I tell him it’s too early, still sleepy-time, go back to bed.

“But, Mommy. I’m AWAKE!” (yes, I hear that!). “Mommy, the clock says…. Six. Three. ….What’s that number?” Which means, I’m up and out of bed to read the unlit digital clock across the room because there’s no way he’s letting this go.

“See, Mommy! The sun is up. It’s wakey-time! Wake up!”

I am so not a morning person. 

Later, he’ll stare at the calendar and insist it is a certain day: “But I want it to be number ONE!”

No, honey, I’ll tell him, we’re already past number one. Today is December 4. We managed to circumvent toddler meltdown by crossing OUT each day with a marker to show that day is done. But it has to be a red one. Also, drawing little pictures of things we’ll do on certain days (a tree for the day we cut our tree, pizza on Friday nights,…) helps him figure out how close we are to known events.

Let’s keep the expectations for these drawings low, very low!

But what makes my mind spin, is how he can speed up days. Our Advent Calendar has a tiny treat in it for each day. About an hour after he has his treat, he suddenly decides, “It’s the next Daaaayyy!” (all happy). When I remind him that we do just one treat a day, this is just a non-issue:

“Mommy, it IS the next day! See? Two-two [twenty-two] and then… two-one [twenty-one]. See? It is. It’s the next one. We have to have our treat now!”

My head spins. I knew time was moving me fast through motherhood, but please don’t speed it up!

How do you get it in little heads that the sun must circle back around (er, we must circle back around?) before we can officially call tomorrow “Today”?

So here we are: He wants to speed up days and hours and moments. And I just want to stop time. I want to tell him, there’s not enough time to skip through time like this… not enough time for me to enjoy these hilarious and shaking-my-head-laughing moments with you. Tell him how every day and moment is precious and let’s just savor it.

I know we’re not promised tomorrow… and the more I mother these little ones, the more I’m reminded life is indeed as trace as vapor.

My son’s blithe skipping through and in and out of time and days and hours, calendars and clocks… he reminds me not to sit here and count moments for too long, but to simply get IN the moments and enjoy them.

And, if we want to eat tomorrow’s treat…today…well, what’s so bad about that?