Yes, sometimes my sweet darling can act like THIS!
So back to the library and the train table. And manners!
No sooner had I sucked up my disappointment at the rudeness of the other child, when my own child decides to have “a moment” of his own! And so now the proverbial shoe was on MY foot!
Deciding one particular train had exhausted its usefulness, my son randomly threw this train onto the floor and grabbed another one off the table. Ah, he’s already become accustomed to our disposable society! To which I said firmly, “Don’t throw the train. Do you want a new train? Okay, pick this one up and put it back first.” And I helped my son bend down and grab the train on the floor and deposit it back on the table before he could play with his newly chosen train. He made a cranky sound for a second, but then allowed me to guide his hand to the thrown toy and place it back on the table. And he happily moved on to toy #2.
I felt, then saw the other mother eyeballing me like I was from Planet MeanMom. The nerve! Actually making my son PICK UP toys instead of allowing him to fling them all over!
Okay, let me back up. I’m not like a total neat-nik (anymore!). At home, if my son is playing, yes, he gets more freedom to let toys run riot on the living room floor. But we weren’t home, we were in a public space. So we needed to exercise a higher level of manners.
Was the train-throwing a small and probably insignificant event? Probably. Is he too young to understand what I had him do, picking up the toy and putting it back? Probably. But when is he “old enough”? Because I fear by that point if I haven’t already helped him go through the motions of being polite, it’s going to be that much harder for him to learn to pick up after himself, to not throw toys, to allow other children to play in the same space.
Is there a “too young” point to begin having children practice good manners?
Liz
Friday 1st of April 2011
I love that you are doing posts on this topic! That is so awesome you had him pick it up. I try to be that way with my little one. We have been working on "we dont throw food" For his 1st bday we got him a book on manners. I read it to him all the time and he says Too Too his way of saying thank you when I give him something he asked for. There needs to be more small children books on manners! Perhaps you should write one "Courteous Car" that is a good name lol
Liz
Friday 1st of April 2011
I love that you are doing posts on this topic! That is so awesome you had him pick it up. I try to be that way with my little one. We have been working on "we dont throw food" For his 1st bday we got him a book on manners. I read it to him all the time and he says Too Too his way of saying thank you when I give him something he asked for. There needs to be more small children books on manners! Perhaps you should write one "Courteous Car" that is a good name lol
T Rex Mom
Thursday 31st of March 2011
Never too young, especially to see manners around them. T Rex Dad and I try to be examples to our kids at all times - try being the operative term. They are always learning - even if just observing our behaviors. And they mimic so much, even at such tiny ages. It is so much easier to start early than later. Once that hard wiring is complete it so significantly more difficult to change behaviors. We also try to tell T Rex that he, too, has to set an example for his sister. He is starting to finally understand this and he's only 3.
T Rex Mom
Thursday 31st of March 2011
Never too young, especially to see manners around them. T Rex Dad and I try to be examples to our kids at all times - try being the operative term. They are always learning - even if just observing our behaviors. And they mimic so much, even at such tiny ages. It is so much easier to start early than later. Once that hard wiring is complete it so significantly more difficult to change behaviors. We also try to tell T Rex that he, too, has to set an example for his sister. He is starting to finally understand this and he's only 3.
Crunchy Beach Mama
Thursday 31st of March 2011
I think being out in public is a whole 'nother game and I do not let my kids get away with anything. I am already starting the 'please' and 'thank you' with P and "talk" to him about manners. He may just look at me now but one day soon he'll be responding :)