Guess what? It's not the front cover of TIME magazine. This may shock and anger some of you but read on to understand why:
It's not about the cover mom's choice to breastfeed longer than most. Or to breastfeed without a nursing cover. Or be photographed while breastfeeding. It's not about her, really. It's about the poor perception of breastfeeding this photo creates.
I don't believe this photo represents the true concept and reasons for breastfeeding.
I don't believe it represents how I personally feel as a breastfeeding mama.
I don't believe it supports moms who breastfeed (no matter how long).
I don't believe it creates cultural acceptance of breastfeeding in our US culture that sexualizes women's body parts and cannot see beyond that to the natural, biological purpose of breastfeeding.
I don't believe it accurately captures how the majority of most women breastfeed (guess what, it's not with a bold stare and a bared chest!).
I don't believe it portrays breastfeeding as a natural and normal way to nurture and feed your baby.
In a culture that fails breastfeeding mothers, creating negative and highly sensationalized publicity around breastfeeding will not get you into my Hall of Fame. Sorry.
So... who IS my breastfeeding hero?
...the mom who tries anything to reduce the pain of breastfeeding so she can continue.
...the mom who attempts, even if she fails.
...the mom who suceeds no matter for how long.
...the mom who can't or isn't interested in breastfeeding but doesn't tear down the idea for other people who are.
...the mom who blogs or talks about her breastfeeding experiences with other moms to gain and give support and information.
...the anyone who doesn't whisper, giggle, blush, look askance at a mother breastfeeding in public (or try to arrest them for public exposure).
...the companies that provide special rooms for nursing moms to pump or feed their child (especially if they are labeled with the global icon for breastfeeding, NOT with a bottle! LOL!).
...the fashion designers who are starting to understand moms would like functional AND fashionable nursingwear for the 6 weeks, 6 months or longer they breastfeed!
...the lactation consultants, nurses, doctors, and breastfeeding specialist who stay well-educated on the topic and dispel common breastfeeding myths.
...the dads, brothers, friends who support moms who breastfeed (whether by keeping other children occupied while she nurses, telling her she's doing a great job, giving hugs, doing a few chores since breastfeeding takes quantities of time, giving mom some extra time to sleep, making sure she is well-nourished... there are so many ways to support a breastfeeding mama!).
My breastfeeding hero, in fact, just might be YOU! It's all of us when we come together to positively and purposefully support breastfeeding women!
My heroes are all the moms who have offered me advice and support. I can proudly say I breastfed my first two until after one and I am currently nursing our third child. Thank you for blogs like these that make me feel less alone! My circle of mom friends have a few that mock me for breastfeeding. My own mom calls me a hippy. It sucks but you wonderful ladies who write about it is what helps me keep chugging through.
My heroes are all the moms who have offered me advice and support. I can proudly say I breastfed my first two until after one and I am currently nursing our third child. Thank you for blogs like these that make me feel less alone! My circle of mom friends have a few that mock me for breastfeeding. My own mom calls me a hippy. It sucks but you wonderful ladies who write about it is what helps me keep chugging through.
Got the most awesome nursing cover last week! It's made by balboa baby and it covers really well despite baby trying her best to pull it away. It bubbles around your body so it's difficult for them to pull it away and stays on your shoulders better for side coverage.
Got the most awesome nursing cover last week! It's made by balboa baby and it covers really well despite baby trying her best to pull it away. It bubbles around your body so it's difficult for them to pull it away and stays on your shoulders better for side coverage.
Thank-you, Julie, for this very well-written and timely post! I read it right away (via Google Reader), but I didn't see the TIME magazine cover photo until yesterday. (So now I *have to* comment!) I agree with YOU! Thank-you for blogging and sharing -- and encouraging -- "normal folks" like me! 😉
Thank-you, Julie, for this very well-written and timely post! I read it right away (via Google Reader), but I didn't see the TIME magazine cover photo until yesterday. (So now I *have to* comment!) I agree with YOU! Thank-you for blogging and sharing -- and encouraging -- "normal folks" like me! 😉
I totally agree. And you made me cry (not that that's really that hard since I'm pregnant!! 😉 ). I have an amazing support network of breastfeeding friends, and a mom and mother-in-law who both nursed all of their babies, and a husband who is so supportive and helpful. I could not have successfully nursed my first for a year and my second for 11 months (and hopefully the next one for more than a year) without my hubby!
I totally agree. And you made me cry (not that that's really that hard since I'm pregnant!! 😉 ). I have an amazing support network of breastfeeding friends, and a mom and mother-in-law who both nursed all of their babies, and a husband who is so supportive and helpful. I could not have successfully nursed my first for a year and my second for 11 months (and hopefully the next one for more than a year) without my hubby!
Very well written Julie! I did not like the cover on the TIME mag either. I only BF for 3 months and was glad I at least tried. I dont look at is a fail but a great run for the time I did do it. And I must say YOU are my BF hero! 🙂
Very well written Julie! I did not like the cover on the TIME mag either. I only BF for 3 months and was glad I at least tried. I dont look at is a fail but a great run for the time I did do it. And I must say YOU are my BF hero! 🙂
Great post! Loved it!
Great post! Loved it!
My mom who breastfed 7 and my sister who breastfed 4 are my heroes if they were able to do it I said so can I. It was hard at first I wasn't producing a lot of milk and my nipples got so cracked that I times I felt like crying but i didn't I breastfed & bottle fed (i had to go back to work and I would pump) my daughter for 1 yr she's a beautiful 3 year old healthy princess. I was never ashamed to feed my daughter out in public. I would always have a nursing cover or a nursing poncho, most of the time people just thought she was sleeping not eating lol and then there were times when people would give me a dirty look but I didn't care.
My mom who breastfed 7 and my sister who breastfed 4 are my heroes if they were able to do it I said so can I. It was hard at first I wasn't producing a lot of milk and my nipples got so cracked that I times I felt like crying but i didn't I breastfed & bottle fed (i had to go back to work and I would pump) my daughter for 1 yr she's a beautiful 3 year old healthy princess. I was never ashamed to feed my daughter out in public. I would always have a nursing cover or a nursing poncho, most of the time people just thought she was sleeping not eating lol and then there were times when people would give me a dirty look but I didn't care.
Julie, I LOVED this post. It may just be the best you've ever written. Amen and amen and THANK YOU!
Julie, I LOVED this post. It may just be the best you've ever written. Amen and amen and THANK YOU!
I'm glad that I'm not the only one that was upset about the Time Magazine cover. I felt it was extremely counter productive for BFing mom's as a whole. I would almost say that I was offended because it does not portray the 'normal' mom that you will see nursing in public or otherwise. I honestly feel like it was a kick in the groin to what the majority of BFing moms are and what BFing IS.
I don't have anyone that I really admire as far as BFing goes. I AM IT. I have nursed all five of my children. My sister had the first grandchild, and the second and never even considered it. In fact she told me when I had my second child, that there was no way that I would be able to BF my daughter AND take care of my toddler. I showed her. Time and time again. She finally BF her fourth baby. It was something that my mother never did. She is still, to this day, disgusted by BFing (and cloth diapering which are both things that I do) but she's been told to GET OVER IT. I hope that my being OPEN about doing things differently and NORMALLY are a good demonstration to my daughter. She's seen me nurse and formula feed. Just like she's seen me use cloth and disposable diapers.
I'm glad that I'm not the only one that was upset about the Time Magazine cover. I felt it was extremely counter productive for BFing mom's as a whole. I would almost say that I was offended because it does not portray the 'normal' mom that you will see nursing in public or otherwise. I honestly feel like it was a kick in the groin to what the majority of BFing moms are and what BFing IS.
I don't have anyone that I really admire as far as BFing goes. I AM IT. I have nursed all five of my children. My sister had the first grandchild, and the second and never even considered it. In fact she told me when I had my second child, that there was no way that I would be able to BF my daughter AND take care of my toddler. I showed her. Time and time again. She finally BF her fourth baby. It was something that my mother never did. She is still, to this day, disgusted by BFing (and cloth diapering which are both things that I do) but she's been told to GET OVER IT. I hope that my being OPEN about doing things differently and NORMALLY are a good demonstration to my daughter. She's seen me nurse and formula feed. Just like she's seen me use cloth and disposable diapers.
I agree! I'm so not a fan of that cover! I wish they would have done a better job.
I agree! I'm so not a fan of that cover! I wish they would have done a better job.
My mom is my breastfeeding hero. She nursed three of her children. Without her and my hubby I wouldn't have kept going. I had a rough time in the beginning with my first and my second...it was a night mare...she wasn't gaining weight, the pediatrician was pushing formula and not giving me any support to keep nursing. My mom and hubby were right there to encourage me to keep going. My brother's wife who had nursed three was a big supporter too.
I am a huge supporter of breastfeeding. I am not a huge supporter of making people feel uncomfortable. I never had a nursing cover. I didn't know there was such a thing until after finished nursing. I just used a blanket. Sometimes I didn't even use a blanket and you know what? I was still able to be discreet. When I went to someone's home or was with other people I would ask...the wife or mom...if they would mind if I nursed with a blanket cover or would they rather I go in another room.
This standing in the middle of a public place exposing yourself and making a big "to do" about the fact that you have the right to feed you baby in public makes me sick. To me it shows how self centered some of these moms can be. it is not about feeding, nurturing and loving a baby. It is about drawing attention to self and proving that you can do whatever you want, where ever you want, whenever you want and you don't care how others are affected by it. It is a shame to use your baby in this way.
Sorry to rant, but I recently heard a story about a woman who does something like this and it really angered me. It gives moms who are trying to handle nursing appropriately a bad name. Anyway, keep up the good work. This is great post!!! Thanks for putting into words the way so many moms feel.
My mom is my breastfeeding hero. She nursed three of her children. Without her and my hubby I wouldn't have kept going. I had a rough time in the beginning with my first and my second...it was a night mare...she wasn't gaining weight, the pediatrician was pushing formula and not giving me any support to keep nursing. My mom and hubby were right there to encourage me to keep going. My brother's wife who had nursed three was a big supporter too.
I am a huge supporter of breastfeeding. I am not a huge supporter of making people feel uncomfortable. I never had a nursing cover. I didn't know there was such a thing until after finished nursing. I just used a blanket. Sometimes I didn't even use a blanket and you know what? I was still able to be discreet. When I went to someone's home or was with other people I would ask...the wife or mom...if they would mind if I nursed with a blanket cover or would they rather I go in another room.
This standing in the middle of a public place exposing yourself and making a big "to do" about the fact that you have the right to feed you baby in public makes me sick. To me it shows how self centered some of these moms can be. it is not about feeding, nurturing and loving a baby. It is about drawing attention to self and proving that you can do whatever you want, where ever you want, whenever you want and you don't care how others are affected by it. It is a shame to use your baby in this way.
Sorry to rant, but I recently heard a story about a woman who does something like this and it really angered me. It gives moms who are trying to handle nursing appropriately a bad name. Anyway, keep up the good work. This is great post!!! Thanks for putting into words the way so many moms feel.
Right on! You said this so well!
Right on! You said this so well!